Is it Rude to Text After 9PM?

Today, people text more than ever. Texting is quick and easy and the recipient can open the messages as they find the time to do so (unlike a phone call, in which you must communicate with the other person in real-time).

But, how late into the night is it ok to text someone, generally speaking? More specifically, is it rude to text after 9PM?

Read on below and discover the in-depth answer to this question!

Is it Rude to Text After 9PM?

The general rule of thumb states that you should not text after 8PM, which makes 9PM an hour too late to text.

In the same breath, this rule is widely overlooked by people who know each other well and communicate late into the night often. 

For example, there is no time too late to text your spouse or lover. Likewise, it is rarely too late to send a text to a co-worker or employee if you have an urgent work-related message for them.

How Rude Is it?


On a scale of 1 to 10, texting after 9PM rates 8 on the rude meter. Generally speaking, it is rude to text people after 8PM, so texting after 9PM is obviously rude too. 

That said, texting your friends, family, and other loved ones after 9PM may not be considered rude (depending on your relationship dynamics).

Why is it Rude?

It’s rude to text the average person after 9PM because people are typically trying to relax at such a time of night. 

Further, if they haven’t turned their phone ringers off (or to vibrate) after 8PM, your texts after 9PM may interrupt their relaxing/family time or disturb them while they are attempting to fall asleep.

Other Options to Do Instead

If you really need to text someone after 9PM, go ahead and do so. Most people will forgive you for texting them late in the evening, so long as it isn’t a pattern. 

There are a few other options to do instead, however:

  • Make yourself a note and text them first thing in the morning
  • Opt for sending an email instead of texting them and risking disturbing them
  • Send an owl or pigeon with a letter to drop off in their mail slot or their open bedroom window
  • Telepathically send them a message instead of texting
  • Conjure up a tulpa and send them with your message

Common Questions

Is it ok to message someone at 9PM?

It isn’t ok to send people messages after 9PM unless they are a family member, good friend, or another loved one.

A main exception to this rule is when it is an emergency or you have an important work-related (or another serious issue) that you need to let someone know about.

Is texting someone late in the night ok?

Texting someone late at night is never ok unless you have a close and personal relationship with the person.

If the person is not a close family member, a good friend, or someone you work with that needs updates about work matters, there are very few circumstances that would make it out to text someone late at night.

Is 10PM too late to text or call someone you like?

Generally, speaking it isn’t ok to text or call someone after 8PM at night. However, this rule is more often than not thrown out the window when it comes to people who like each other or are dating.

In such a case, there is literally no time of the day or night that is completely off-limits to text or call said person.